Pit's Top Tweets



Heather Mills accused of verbally abusing Paralympic official. She hasn't a leg to stand on I'm afraid.
29s
Do not listen to the hyperbole of Owen Jones! He'd have you all running around, wearing Onesies, and listening to John Lennon's "Imagine"




I've just won 200 straight games of Rock, Paper, Scissors. That Edward Scissorhands is so predictable. -- Doctor Dementia (@Demented_Jokes)

@UKIPThurrock The Rise of UKIP "Best Video Ever" UKIP supporters. Re-Tweet, & Re-Tweet. from Chabbyvids YouTube. http://t.co/7wlYrF3MTE -- Gregg M (@moggdm)

Comic Relief. Where the BBC license payer gets to donate millions to the leader of the BBC's favourite political causes. Remarkable -- Old Holborn (@Old_Holborn)

I get panic attacks if I think I haven't retweeted enough. Then I get panic attacks if I think I retweeted too much. I get panic attacks. -- veggie femme (@veggiefemme)

Papa Diop I'm in trouble deep, Papa Diop I've been losing sleep.... #europa -- Shoppy (@palpatinespit)

Patrice Evra came to visit yesterday. Offered him a drink, I only had Um Bongo in... He complained to the FA. Awkward -- Ji Sung Park (@RealParkJiSung)

'Get her jugs out!'. Outstanding. #bbcdp. Laura Bates.....just shut up you stupid annoying wench -- Shoppy (@palpatinespit)

It's my grandfather's birthday today. We plan to drive him round the block and tell him he had a great time at a Saga resort #dementia -- Shoppy (@palpatinespit)

On a scale of 1-10 how old are you? -- Not A Rapist (@NoRapist)

What's Forrest Gump's password? 1forrest1 -- Puns (@omgthatspunny)

David Beckham's son was given detention for getting 0/10 for his homework. The school said they don't tolerate parents helping their kids -- Palpatine's Pit (@palpatinespit)

Are you a 4%? - 96% of all mass media is controlled by 5 corporations. They are Viacom, Disney, Bertelsmann, AOL Time Warner, News Corp. -- Charles Edward Frith (@charlesfrith)

What do you call a man with no legs? ..................Fuck all... He might shoot you. -- Ken Barlow (@_Ken_barlow_)

Pistorius to plead the only thing that will get him off + can be found in Shaggy's Law, page 452, paragraph 3, sub section 2. "It wasn't me" -- Palpatine's Pit (@palpatinespit)



Can't wait to get home and play Grand Theft Auto. I'm going to get a hooker, fuck her, then kill them to get my money. Then I'll play GTA -- Mr Trollington (@Sultan_George)

Just before Pistorius shot her she said....'I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion' -- Palpatine's Pit (@palpatinespit)

Roses are red, Pistorius on bail, she wasn't a replicant, now fk off to jail #thatisall #bladerunner -- Palpatine's Pit (@palpatinespit)

Blade Runner Oscar Pistorius has been arrested over the fatal shooting of his girlfriend. Police said he wasn't unarmed but he was unlegged -- Palpatine's Pit (@palpatinespit)








Wonder if Roy Keane's ever asked for the Naked Gun : Tirty Tree and a Turd -- Palpatine's Pit (@palpatinespit)

Richard III would be turning in his car park if he knew what these politicians were up to #huhne -- Palpatine's Pit (@palpatinespit)

Resistance is not futile... it's voltage divided by current -- Dr Skip Licker PhD (@Skip_Licker)

Strange moment when they asked Portillo a question about the sexualisation of children and privacy. He was miles away. #bbctw -- Will Black (@WillBlackWriter)

@Ed_Miliband Great stuff Ed, now its time to support equality for Muslims by supporting our feminist campaign #EqualButDifferent -- MoDawahMoParody (@kingofdawah)

If Nicki Minaj married Nigel Farage, would that make her Nicki Minaj Farage?



BREAKING: Paul Lambert appointed as managing director of Twitter - immediately sending the social network site down. -- BBC Sporf (@BBCSporf) 

#starwarsfilms
Honey I Shrunk The Sith, Platooine, My Sith, Darth Insidious

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